Monday, May 24, 2010

Cleanliness is Next to...

Before I begin anything, today I found a four leaf clover. The odds of finding a four leaf clover are 10,000 to 1. I looked it up. Pretty cool. The thing is, I’ve found eight four leaf clovers this year. And one five leaf. I didn’t even know there was such a thing as a five leaf clover. What does it all mean? I don’t know. I just thought I’d share.


What is the deal with showering? Why is it that almost every contemporary book I’ve read has a shower scene in it? No, not A shower scene, but mention of multiple showers. The character showers here, he showers there…

I’m all for cleanliness. Heck, I this rant popping to mind while I was in the shower. But honestly, how much showering can one person do? I’ve read books where the heroine is hosing down morning and night. Does she not get dry skin with all that scrubbing?

This seems particularly common in romances. Perhaps it is to imply that when the couple gets down and dirty, they aren’t –you know- actually dirty. And please, let us not forget the good old, rinsing out of the bra and undies in the sink during those road stories. Yes, clean underwear is essential. But why do I have to read about it? And really? You need to clean your bra after one wear? But why? I mean if you’re showering twice daily, I’m going to assume you’re a pretty clean person. I think you’re safe wearing that bra a second day.

So can we please stop the insanity? Leave off with the non-randy thus boring shower scenes, grooming scenes, scenes were we are assured that the heroine eats right and saves fuzzy bunnies while feeding the homeless!

The endless shower scenes are the ultimate in Mary Sue behavior. They don’t forward the plot, they don’t tell me anything about the character. And I for one am all washed out by them.

End Rant.

So what about you? What drives you batty in stories?


  1. Hmm, shower scenes ... you know, I always notice the shower scenes in the Stephanie Plum books. Stephanie takes *a lot* of showers. I can't say that they particularly bug me ... but I do notice them. Maybe that's because I usually read historicals, where baths and showers are few and far between!

    As to what drives me batty in stories ... info dumps. I'm reading two historicals at the moment, both set in France, and they're motoring along nicely, engaging and interesting, and then BAM! ... the dreaded "As you know, Jacques," begin:

    "As you know, Jacques, construction work on the Eiffel Tower began in 1887 ..."

    "As you know, Jacques, the Duke de Morny is the bastard half-brother of the emperor of France ...."

    There are much more elegant and interesting ways to weave historical details into a story ... and if you can't figure how to do so, then leave them OUT!

    End of rant. :-)

  2. Talking about the four-leaf clovers.. I know a girl who grows them.. she seems to be able to grow 4, 5 and even 6 leaf clovers with apparent ease. Her secret? She sings to them. True story!

  3. Rach--

    LOL, I don't know why the shower thing suddenly stuck in my craw. Can you just imagine multiple bath scenes? Tee hee.

    But yeah, the info dump ESPECIALLY in dialogue is SO annoying. And when it is repeat for the benefit of other characters...gah!

  4. Tazaria-

    I've heard singing to plants makes a huge difference. Pretty cool, though that she gets all those lucky clovers.

  5. I have never ever found a four leaf clover. Jenny C gave me a few that she had between the pages of her copy of Outlander, when we met at Fergus, and those are the only real ones I've ever seen in my life!
    Maybe they only grow in certain areas?

    Ack, showering. You're right, Stephanie Plum does shower a lot! I get more annoyed by characters that spend all day outside doing all sorts of crazy things, then walk right into the kitchen and start chopping veggies or putting their hands in ground beef to make hamburgers. Ack!!! Ew! Yuck! For my peace of mind, can't the author just put in two words about washing hands? And not in the kitchen sink!
    But maybe that's just me... Then there's kids who play outside in jeans and come and flop down on the bed, putting their dirty pants right up against the pillows their faces go on at night. Ick!!!

    Okay, I'll stop ranting :-)